NHR- Holiday Philanthroparty

I love hosting parties.

There's something about a handful of friends having a good time over good food, games, and some spirits.

This year I wanted to do something different, something with a philanthropic twist. Enter the bless bag. 

A while ago I began serving dinner at a local homeless shelter in DC. Despite the rumors that the homeless people near the White House are really secret service agents, 23% of  the DMV population is considered homeless. What's even more heartbreaking is the fact that over 3,000 children are included in this statistic. (source: Homelessness in Metropolitan Washington)

I've always had a servant's heart. My parents (mummy in particular) involved us in various donation/charitable event/ volunteer opp linked to Haiti since I can remember. So when I found out that the organization I volunteer with also has a shower program, my wheels began spinning on how I could help those in need. 

Since they receive clothing contributions on the regular, I decided to make a contribution of toiletry items that participants could take with them after showering and changing their clothes. I then made up my mind to throw a holiday philanthro-party, where instead of playing Taboo, spades or dominoes for 5 hours, we spend that time creating these toiletry/snack (bless) bags to donate.

So a few weeks ago, I sent out a clarion call to my friends and set up a sign-up sheet of items needed, and like the rock-stars they are, the donations came rolling in. These bless bags included one of each of the following:

Toothbrush
Toothpaste

Moist Towelettes

Hand Sanitizer Wipes

Dental Flossers

Dental Toothpicks

Q-Tips

Tissue

Soap 

Lotion

Band-Aids

Granola Bars

Pudding Cups

Crackers& Cheese

Juice Boxes

Index card w/ encouraging scripture

In the end, we had stuffed over 75 bags to donate. I know I'm blessed, but volunteering at this shelter has opened my eyes and heart to the reality that not everyone is as fortunate as I am, or as many of us are to indulge in some of the simplest pleasures in life such as sitting down to a meal, or laying in a warm bed at night. It's my hope that through these re-occurring bless bag parties, we'll provide some of the most basic items to the neediest of society. 

If you're looking for a way to help the less fortunate this holiday season, why not throw a bless bag party and then hand them out to the homeless person you pass by everyday during your commute to work? Or even at a park where homeless persons are known to spend the night?

You're blessed in order to be a blessing...so be one.

Happy Holidays friends.

Whoever is generous to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will repay him for his deed - Proverbs 19:17

Now that's love

Love isn't a four letter word. It's an action... my devotional this morning was on loving via our actions and it made me think of all the people in my life that I say 'I love you' to. 

The Bible says, "Let us stop just saying we love each other; let us really show it by our actions." (1 John 3:18 NLT) We can talk a good act: "I love people." But do we really love them? Our love is revealed in how we act toward them. - Rick Warren. 

There are those who I know love me via their actions, others who say it but only half heartedly behave in such manner, and others who clearly love themselves more than anyone else. 

I'll get off my soapbox now, but before I leave my dear friend Kareen sent me this picture today... she loves me, and if any man I date did this I'd know it was real...

Love. 

...and they're off

Had to work on sealing the bottles so that they'd arrive intact, sorry for the delay, but I wanted to err on the side of caution. 

I promise the post office by my office has to be ranked #1 on customer service.  I weighed, labeled, and mailed 20 packages in 5 mins. 

Once you receive your sample please take a length shot prior to use. I'd like to see comparison shots after 6-8 weeks of use. 

Thanks guys! I'm excited!

Winter Break

Meet Olivia , my brazilian body wave layered bob and closure.

She's my lover for the winter.

My original plan was to use some old Brazilian hair I had to make a wig for these cold winter months, but when my sister and I decided to head to South Florida for Thanksgiving, I made an appointment with my stylist extraordinaire  Christina  at Studiotress to have her lay some hands on this head.

And as usual, she delivered.

If you've been a faithful reader, Christina also laid Sheeba out back in March when I had my Brazilian Kinky-Curly install. This girl is talented, so I wanted to use this post as a two-for-one: share my new do' and highlight a small business since today is Small Business Saturday.

As a working/professional natural, I cannot stress how much I appreciate good service. Especially as my hair grows. I've previously recounted several occasions when I've walked out of appointments or had a few choice words with hair dressers who have complained about the length and thickness of my hair. Christina's one of a handful of my stylists who love my hair, in fact, each appointment some how turns into a professional development session for both client and service provider.

This time was no different. I initially requested a short Mimi G - type coif, but when she began blowing out Sheeba for my coif, there was some discussion as to how we would achieve a flat foundation braid pattern for such a short do. I then stumbled upon a picture of Rashida Jones' natural bang, and my vision changed. I told her that I wanted an angled bob a la First Lady with some Rashida bangs, that could also be worn as a variation of Olivia Pope's do' from Scandal (Season 1). I love when my stylist gets my quirky visions. I also love sharing good service, I'm not one to hold onto a gem and not share with others because I don't want others knowing my secret. I prefer to tell the world because I discovered many of my stylists via word of mouth, so I like to pay it forward whenever possible.

Sorry for the blurriness :/

So it's time to pay it forward, below you'll find a list of my favorite stylists. I share this information freely with many of my friends quiet often, and if you've been a faithful follower (subscribe to the right), we are basically family anyways, so I don't mind sharing who keeps Sheeba looking good when I don't have the strength or time to do so myself. 

I get my hair done mainly in DC, but travel to Miami for my sew-ins.

DC -

• Press - Tizeta @ Kedus Salon (301) 495-0114
• Twists (w/ my own hair) - Yaella @ Twist it Sistah (202) 832-3157
• Cut & color - Camille @ Salon Noire (301) 495-5873
• Braids, Senegalese/ Kinky Twists (with synthetic or human hair) - Julie*

Miami - 

• Sew-ins - Christina @ Salontress
• Braids - Marie*
• Kinky Twists - Nadia*

* My braiders usually work from home, so if interested inbox me for their contact information.

I love supporting small businesses, especially since many of the products that I (previously) used were created by small local vendors who had a genuine interest in providing quality products for natural consumers. If you have a favorite product or stylist feel free to share, I'll be posting small business features monthly in an effort to share some of Sheeba's faves.

If you're a small business interested in being interviewed for a future post, please email me at sosheeba@gmail.com.

Happy growing.

Natural Attraction

The other day, someone reminded me of something my mother told me when I initially went natural. She disapproved of my choice because "no man thinks that natural hair is attractive."

I'm glad I brushed off her spicy West-Indian old woman comment because regardless of her length, Sheeba is a flame that many moths are attracted to.

I've often referred to Sheeba as my crown & glory, and apparently now she's my wing(wo)man??

Many of you are not ready for this post, but I'm gonna take it there anyways. Indulge me for a moment or two...

Over the past four years I've silently conducted a social experiment with my hair, both with the parentals and with men/women. With each round of testing, the results have been the same: my hair (in her natural state) attracts a variety men.

Sheeba . be . pullin .

Not that I ever had a problem in that area, but it amazes me how many men (of all backgrounds) I either catch staring at me or are bold enough to approach me whenever I unleash Sheeba.

I have had men compliment my brush cut, coil a tendril in my TWA, and sniff my Coco Castor scented hair during my commute to work. I have had others ask to touch her. I've even had someone ask to lay in my hair (I can't make this up).

...I don't even want to get into the reaction I get from my larger-than-life-blow-outs (a la Diana Ross in Mahogany). Blow-outs seem to send them into a tizzy. I once fielded a scalp massage from an Italian who wanted to confirm whether or not my hair was real. I'm not going to lie... I enjoyed it (don't judge me), but it made me seriously begin to question why men from all walks of life were amazed by my natural hair.

So after several stares and similar reactions, I began asking these complete strangers why they were so fascinated by Sheeba and the most common reply I received was how confident I appeared in all my kinky-coily glory.

The odd thing is I overstand their reasoning. My closest friends will tell you that I am a quintessential introvert, but when my hair is freshly styled and looking lovely...

hon-TEEE, I'm as bold as they come. It wasn't Kelis' milkshake that brought all those boys to the yard.

I was watching this Youtube documentary on Jewish clothing customs and one of the women interviewed said something that resonated with me..[her] concept of beauty is often associated with [her] hair, the same truth is evident for me. My hair is my energy, my beauty, my aura; I thrive when she thrives and vice-versa.

You know how superhero's have theme songs that play when they enter a scene? That's how I am with Sheeba. When my hair is coiffed and micro-waves laid, I feel beyond beautiful, I'm  invincible. A good hairstyle will have me feeling celebratory. It's the same 'I can have all that' feeling I get from putting on a well-tailored suit and power Louboutin Rolando pumps for a presentation or interview. The world is my oyster when my hair looks fab.

Now don't think I have self-esteem issues. I'm just as confident when Sheeba's having a bad day, it's just magnified when I have her freshly done. When Sheeba was first born, I routinely got my eyebrows and hair shaped every Tuesday. For me, freshly done eyebrows and hair uplift my spirit. In fact, the other day my twist out was on life support so I finger detangled it, put it into a high bun, and went to get my eyebrows threaded. I was the epitome of casual, and still had someone compliment me on my way home...

My final thoughts on all this is that there are some men who are attracted to a certain level of confidence in a woman. Wearing ones hair in it's natural state and being comfortable with ones natural appearance is as confident as one can be. And when someone is comfortable in their natural beauty (no preservatives, no additives, 100% au naturel), there's nothing you can tell them to make them think otherwise. So if you're 2 days or 2 years natural, or even if you've faithfully had a relaxer for a lifetime; wear your mane proudly, I guarantee that you'll feel amazing and as a result field a few compliment/ stares from an admirer.


Now silky Sheeba fields more compliments from women
*Evelyn side-eye*

.... working on that social experiment next.

Happy (Showing) & Growing...

Get Excited!

About a month ago, I made a request for volunteers to try my infused Castor Oil growth aide. After a few minor tweaks to the recipe, I'm happy to say that we're ready to send out samples.

Thanks so much for your patience and an even bigger thank you for being a volunteer. 

It's my hope that my sprout oil helps promote growth as it has for me. 

Now get growing!

Sheeba

Henna pt. deux

Yesterday I posted part one of my henna process. Today's post shall outline the application phase.

By now your henna should be mixed, and have released some dye. You'll notice pools of red liquid forming on the top layer and your henna should be a darker shade at this point. Before applying it to your hair, add 2 tbsps of honey and mix.

You will also need to cover your application area. I need a mirror, so I use my bathroom. Since I've done this a few times before, all I did to prep the area was lay an old towel on the floor. If your sink and counter top are white or light, you'll want to cover those with newspaper as well. Better safe than sorry cause henna does not wash completely out of grout, tile, or carpet.

After prepping your area, you'll need to prep your hair. I finger detangle and then section Sheeba into 5-6 parts using clips to hold each section into place. I then apply vaseline to the perimeter of my hair, ears, and neck. I even apply into the inside of my ear and all of my neck. As you can see, the henna gets smudged everywhere, and the vaseline protects my skin from being stained.


Now to apply. I separate each large section into about 3-4 smaller pieces a I apply the henna. The trick to this step is to scoop a small amount with your hand as you 'smush' it through your hair. It's easier to control smaller portions of the mixture than a handful which will inevitably end up on the floor or down your shirt. I begin in the back and work my way forward.







Once all the sections are complete, I take the remaining henna and apply it to my ends and then 'massage' the rest into the top layer of hair.







Secure you hair on the top of your hair with pins and cover with a plastic bag or shower cap. I then cover my head with a turbie-twist, or a towel you don't mind getting dirty. I like to let my henna sit for 6-8 hours.

There are two methods you can use to wash your hair:

1. The Dunk Method: fill your tub, sink, or bucket with warm water, and 'dunk' your head; or
2. The Rinse Method: place head under running water (either sink or shower) and rinse the mixture out.

Either method takes time, I spent about 45 minutes in the shower just rinsing my hair until the water dripping from my ends were a light red. At this point I added some V05 Chamomile Tea conditioner to my mane and squeezed it out.  You'll want to use a moisturizing conditioner and NOT a protein one. (Tresseme Naturals, and Aubrey Organics Honeysuckle Rose also work for this step).

Continue to apply and squeeze out conditioner until it is clear and your hair is henna free. Detangle if needed, finger combing my hair prior to applying the henna helped, so I only had to use my Jilbere comb once and did not need to use my Denman.

Seal and style as usual once done. If you have long hair, plan to be in the shower for 1.5-2 hours... It takes a while to get the henna out of Sheeba, I tell no lie.

As you can see, my hair has a subtle reddish tint to it, and a bit more curl definition than before. Sheeba is ridiculously soft and moisturized now, which was my primary objective when I embarked on this henna journey. Because winter can be harsh on my hair, I tend to henna in the cooler months, when the air is drier, just to keep my situation soft and growing.

I'd love to hear your henna exploits, and if you haven't tried a henna treatment...what are you waiting for?? Your hair will thank you.

Happy Growing!

It's Time for a New Look

Finally bought and registered a domain for Sheeba. I like to treat her to nice things sometimes.

Speaking of treating Sheeba, it's time for my yearly henna treatment. So I decided to post a pic-tutorial for everyone who has ever considered applying henna to their coils but didn't know where to begin. The first time I henna'd my hair, it was touch and go, but the results were lovely. I did - however - end up with my tub looking like the river Nile.

I hope this pic-torial reduces the level of fear many have as it pertains to using henna. Although there are a few moving parts to this process, it really is quite simple once you've planned and prepared for it. Depending on you hair length, allot 1-3 days from start (mixing) to finish (rinsing out). A shorter (and a bit more expensive) alternative would be to purchase Henna blocks from Lush. My only hang-up with using this product is it doesn't seem to be pure henna (some variations have coffee, lemon, indigo, and etc.) I want to condition my hair, not dye it as this product does.

Throughout the natural community, you'll hear people speaking of the many benefits of henna. It's ultra conditioning, strengthens strands, soothes the scalp, and even colors gray hair. I love henna because it makes my hair uber soft. The only downside for me is the change in curl pattern that occurs. But it's something I can live with since they are more defined as a result.

I mixed my henna on Friday night, let the dye release all Saturday, applied it Sunday afternoon, and rinsed it out Sunday night. I basically follow CurlyNikki's process, it's easy and broken down in stages. You'll need the following:

• gloves, newspaper, plastic bowl, shower cap, Vaseline, and a shirt you don't care for
• 150-200 g body grade henna
• 2 cups boiling water
• 4 Green tea bags
• 2 tbsp honey

First gather your ingredients, I like to have everything in the same area to reduce the amount of mess and potential discoloration.

Next, sift your henna into bowl. You'll thank me later for this step when you're not pulling henna grit from your hair a week after application.

While sifting, heat water and allow tea bags to seep for 10-15 minutes. I filled my sauce pan for the tea, but only used 2 cups for my henna mixture. I drank the rest.

Slowly mix the hot tea mixture into your henna. You can use a plastic spoon for this step, I happened to have a good spoon on hand. The henna doesn't stain silverware, so no need to panic.

This is what your mixed henna should look like. I compare it to mashed potatoes or fudge brownie mix, you don't want it too thin because it may make the application process messy.

Real body-grade henna will release some dye quickly, so be sure to wash it off your hand or stained counter tops immediately. You can see here how my finger turned orange after cleaning the spoon.

I prefer to let my henna sit for 24 hours before application. This will allow the dye to release and the henna to have a more conditioning effect on your strands. Place your bowl in a warm place (like on the heater). Your henna will get darker as the dye releases. (I'm also working on a few art pieces for my linesisters, hence why my heater is in multipurpose use at the moment). You can also turn on your oven and place the bowl on the stove to heat it up.

 

Part 2: The Application Process shall be posted soon.

Happy Growing!

Two Things

I've been busy doing hair consultations and cooking up all types of natural hair oil deliciousness. Mea culpa. Mea culpa for abandoning you like this. I'll do better.

I wanted to touch on something that I have come to terms with as a naturalista.

I will always have dandruff and split ends.

The split ends I can deal with. Using the 'search and destroy' method soothes my minor OCD and is oddly therapeutic when combined with a good Netflix marathon of HIMYM, New Girl, or Orange is the New Black.

Dandruff on the other hand will continue to annoy me. I have tried basically everything under the sun:

Dermatologist prescribed medicated shampoo and gel? Ugh. Yes.

Over the counter cleansers and treatments? Yup.

Coconut Oil? Love it, but no dice.

I've also tried teatreeoilapplecidervinegarrinsesblacksoaphoneyhennaneemshikakaipaste and justabouteverythingundermymothersbathroomsink.

Sadly, it all begins to run together after some point.

Recently, out of frustration, I whipped mango butter and some moisturizing oils I had on hand. The result: less flakes, some itching, and a semi happy scalp. 

The verdict is still out on this blend, but I think it's working. The true test will be if it survives this winter dryness. 

I'd love to hear what works for you. Send me an email sosheeba@gmail.com, I'm willing to try anything (that I haven't) at this point. 

Happy growing. 

Winterizing

It's getting cold. Time to winterize my hair. For those of you who live in more tropical environments, be glad that you can use the same products regardless of the season and have the same results.

Up north, where cold weather takes your life and hair hostage, you have to rotate your products. 

Realtors live by location, and naturalists live by rotation ... corny? Yeah I know, but it made me laugh nonetheless. 

Go ahead and hide your humectants, light oils and butters. It's time to break out the heavier moisturizers and butters. 

Cold weather, while great for wearing a press, can be drying and harsh on your strands. Being that the air is dry, your hair is susceptible to the same condition. 

One thing I notice during winter months is how much dandruff I develop. It's cold outside (0 humidity) and keeping my heat at 80 (I like it hot) makes the air in my house dry as well. So to combat dry scalp and dry ends here are a few adjustments I make to my routine:

1. Hair Grease- I feel like I just cursed. But before you nail me to the wall for this tidbit, let me explain. I 'grease' my scalp weekly and post wash with a pomade that I threw together of mango butter and  moisturizing oils.

Speaking of things I 'throw together,' I recently did something scary. I made a test batch of my infused hair growth castor oil and am sending it out to friends and colleagues for market research. I'm interested in finding out what makes Sheeba grow like she does and then sharing it with the world. I know sooooo many women who have approached me over the years, inquiring about my regimen, growth aids used, etc. So in a few months, I'll know if its the oil, my herbal tea (batch coming soon email sosheeba@gmail.com if you'd like to part of my test group), or mummy's good genes making Sheeba grow so long.

2. Hot oil treatments - help keep your scalp moisturized. An added boost would be to steam your hair weekly to penetrate the hair shaft. 

3. Shun the wash and go or frequent washing completely - this may sound counter intuitive, but wet hair= sick and I don't have time for pneumonia. Honestly since I love hiding my hair, I notice that Sheeba grows more when left to her own devices. 

4. Be careful of winter hats - I have big hair, so berets and such never work for me, but fuzzy ear warmers do the trick. The downside to wearing these cute creations is the havoc they wreak on my edges. If you are going to wear wool or acrylic hats/ accessories, be sure to line them with a satin scarf/ bonnet, or else you can kiss your edges goodbye.

Hopefully this winter will be mild and not produce any (snow) flakes.

Happy growing. 

Survival of the Silky?

It’s been a while. My apologies, but summer and its golden rays of splendor have kept me busy enjoying warm weather, road trips, and outdoor happy hours.

Many things have changed since my last post, and may things remain the same.

I’m still natural; still lovehating my hair (yes, I know that’s not a word, but I use it anyways); and still getting phone calls from my mother regarding Sheeba.

Which spurred this post.

Mummy called me the other day to discuss her views on Sheryl Underwood’s claims that natural hair was ‘nasty,’ and while my mother is the type of person to say crass things, and then concede that she doesn’t include my hair in such remarks, she still feels some type of way about kinky coily hair…

anywhoo

During our conversation, she talked about many of the natural hair news that has occurred over the past few months (school policies banning afro puffs, natural students being teased, Sheryl’s comment, and etc.) and then told me that she hopes I relax my (future) daughters hair to shield her from such a harsh life.

[Insert flashback vignette] My mother relaxed my hair when I was six. Before that I had gone to a Haitian preschool with children who ‘looked’ like me, but once we moved to the suburbs I got relaxed and amassed a collection of those white ‘Just for Me’ cassette tapes (reach back to 1990 for that relic). My mother didn’t relax my hair because it was unmanageable; she did it so that my sister and I would ‘blend’ in with our American counterparts.

So I began to wonder… how many other moms hold this Darwinistic view towards relaxers? My mother made it seem like relaxing our hair increased our survival rate more than it reduced the amount of time she had to spend styling our hair. I don’t plan on being that type of mother. In fact, I don’t plan on relaxing my daughters hair at all. Now if she wants to wear her hair straight, we can discuss non-chemical alternatives, but relaxers shall be a non-factor until she’s grown.

Sheryl's comment struck a nerve with me because deep down there's a seed of self hate planted within her. Someone told her many mango seasons ago that her natural hair was nasty, causing that view to take root and grow. That comment was the fruit of that planted seed. And while her apology was necessary, it wasn't sincere. She may have killed that 'nasty natural tree' but the root hasn't been eradicated. I'm sure under those many weaves and wigs she wears is a head of such nasty hair being forced into submission by chemicals and heat. And if she is natural, (sigh) then I think it's time for some much needed self-reflection and acceptance. 

I normally rant on and on about my hair and stay out of social discussions, but one has to wonder how many children are picked on because of their natural hair, and what the implications will be later down the road as it relates to their self-esteem. How many will grow up to love their curls and how many will grow up to detest them? My heart hurts for those who will develop self-image issues. Although so many women have embraced their naturalness, Underwood’s remarks provide for a clear reminder that in our society only the silkiest survive. 

The Quest

If you've been a faithful reader, by now you're well aware of the fact that I do not like doing my hair. It pains me, yet ironically I'm on a mission to grow Sheeba to waist length (and beyond).

Enter 'The Quest'.

I plan on wearing my hair in a protective style 2-3 months at a time for a full year. This wasn't really planned, I sort of fell into this as my laziness increased, by the time I realized how how long I had hidden my hair, 4 months had lapsed. 

Kind of like finding out you're with child a full trimester in. (Bad reference? Sorry it was the only one that came to mind).

Anywhoo-

This all began in March with 'Sophia' my Brazilian Kinky Curly install (March- mid-May). Then I wore Sheeba in twisted up-dos from mid-May til June. I'm wearing 'Coco' my NHA Mongolian install for all of July, andI plan on welcoming August with Havana twists or faux locs... that'll be a game time decision.

I'm looking forward to doing my hair to not do my hair. You should join me...

Weavie Wonder

Every two months or so, I find a new protective style to hide my hair under. And every time I tell my family or my lovebug that I'm getting my hair 'did,' I always receive a similar reply: "Why?" or "You have all this beautiful hair, why do you cover it up with this fake stuff?"

I'd love to switch places with them for a few days, just so they understand the struggle I encounter when I wash and style my hair. 

I usually reply that I want to give my hair a rest from being constantly manipulated or because I'm getting tired of doing my hair regularly, but it's really because I want my hair to grow undisturbed. I have found that my hair sprouts when I've hidden it for 2-3 months at a time.

Over the past four years, I have worn braids, kinky twists, Senegalese twists, and sew-ins. As my hair

got longer I found it difficult to find someone in the DMV area to style my hair the way I liked at a reasonable price, so whenever I would go home to visit my mother, I also get my hair done by a close friend for the lowski-woahski.

But times have changed, and sometimes our schedules do not align as they once did, so I've taken to the mean streets of YouTube to teach myself the art of wig-making... I praise baby Jesus for wig tutorials, because they've revolutionized my protective style game. I have since revamped my Brazilian Kinky Curly (Sophia) and am in the process of wigging my Mongolian Kinky Curly to debut over the weekend using this tutorial. I'll update this post once I've installed my new hair.

Here are a few links and steps to get you started:

1. Purchase good quality hair, I use vendors from the UK/ France and LOVE not only the customer service but the price and quality. Desir Hair and EHM Hair Company have done me well. They have sales frequently so stalk their page before you buy. I also have Halley Curls in my stash for when I want a straight look. I have heard of people purchasing hair from Ali Express, and my only comment on that is you get what you pay for, so proceed with caution. Princess Hair Shop, Sheena's Emporium, Wagman's and etc. are also a few other places to look for hair. I now prefer purchasing curly hair since Sheeba's long and I don't want to worry about my braid pattern being ultra flat, but at the end of the day, I recommend buying what you can afford and will make you feel/look good.

2. Wash and SEAL SEAL SEAL your wefts prior to installing. Seal both sides, I made the mistake of only sealing one side of my Braz and had hair shedding daily. I use a combination of Dritz Fray Check and Aleene's Fabric Fusion. I seal one side with the Dritz, and the other with Aleene's. There's no real reason for my method, I just like having one side shiny and the other matte, ESPECIALLY when I'm working in the front of my wig.

3. Customize your wig head. The ones at the beauty supply store run for about $2.99, but since I have a big head I use packing tape to increase the circumference and nape size. Creating a wig head to the specs of your head make it easier to lay your tracks and ensure a proper fit.

4. Purchase a dome cap and wig clips. My first few attempts at wig making were with the netted wig cap, but it didn't really feel 'secure' when I wore it. I was in fear that my hair would fall off in the wind or if I had to sprint for the bus. Dome caps are tighter and make me feel like it's sewn in.

My next project (after the Mongolian KC wig) shall be fantastical, I've stalked the Internets and haven't seen one like it. Stay tuned loves, but until then... happy growing.

EDIT: 07/07/13 - As promised, here is my newest install 'Coco'. I followed the YouTube tut posted
above, but sewed it in a side part pattern instead of a side-swoop. My hair is braided underneath so I actually have no leave-out. I love her, she's soft, she's beautiful, she's Sheeba's twin if I was ever brave enough to rock a wash-n-go.

The Fall Out

I'm in the mood to write today, so you're getting a two for one special.

I love a good deal. Don't you?

I wanted to touch on a subject that's usually unspoken of in natural hair circles ( or at least in mine), and that is the unintentional dangers of being natural. While visiting my linesister the other day, she shared with me a story of how she almost fell out while washing her hair. While I stared at her in disbelief, it wasn't because of the shock associated with her story, but because I, too, have shared the same experience. Only, I actually fell out - several times - while washing my hair.

You see washing my hair with warm water creates a 'sauna-like' environment in my bathroom. And if I haven't eaten or drank a few cups of water prior to washing my hair, I get dizzy, and have on an unfortunate occasion or two fallen out in the bathroom.

No one talks about this side of being natural, no one shares their horror stories, no one warns newly napptural nubians of these 'dangers'.

Now while I have built upper arm strength washing, detangling, and twisting Sheeba, I have also strained my neck, aggravated lymph nodes in my neck, induced migraines from tight styles, slipped on conditioner in the tub and nearly blinded my self during ACV rinses. I'm actually laughing as I write this, but the natural plight is anything but funny.

While I have gotten better at reducing my life endangering washday encounters and washing my hair with cooler water to prevent steaming myself, as my hair gets longer, it's going to take longer to twist, thereby causing my wrists, fingers, and forearms to hurt. In comparison to my scalp being burned by heat and chemicals, I actually prefer the 'circuit training' Sheeba has  put me through.

Now if only I could hire a professional natural stylist. She'd be a life saver in every sense of the word.

Have you met Daniel?

I fast... a lot. For the past 10 years, I've fasted from certain foods during Lent. For the past year, I have made this a regular habit. Each month, I along with several people worldwide, complete a Daniel's Fast known as holdFAST during the first three days of the month. There have also been times throughout the year when I've completed 21 and 40 day Daniel's fasts and have planned out fasting menus for others.

For those unfamiliar with this type of fast, it's in reference to the Old Testament book of Daniel. In this piece of scripture, Daniel "ate no pleasant food, no meat or wine" (Daniel 10:2-3) for three weeks.  The fast itself requires that you only eat fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts and legumes. No dairy, no sugar, no meat. My rule of thumb is if it doesn't grow that way, I have no business eating it. I do, however, incorporate foods derived from allowable items (brown rice pasta, yellow corn meal, etc.)

If you're still reading and I haven't lost your attention, I bring up the subject of fasting because it not only has improved my walk with God and spiritual life, but has also improved my health.

Being that this is a hair blog, I wanted to share a side effect of having a plant based eating preference. When I stopped eating dairy, processed food, and meat and started eating fruits, veggies, and nuts/ legumes, my hair grew like weeds, my skin was soft, dewy, and clear, and I had tons of energy.

Throughout these past few years, I have met several who don't know when to fast, how to fast, or what to fast from. Fasting isn't impossible, it just takes discipline, (tons of) prayer, and strength. 

Not ready to take the plunge? Here are a few baby steps to get you on your way:

1. Begin by drinking half your weight in water daily (if you weight 10 lbs, drink 5 oz of water) or 64oz of water - whichever is greater. 

2. Once you've mastered drinking more water, move onto reading food labels to identify disallowed foods (you would be surprised at how man things contain processed sugar, cane juice, additives, and corn syrup).

3. Begin eating more leafy greens. I make my own salads and green smoothies with Romaine, Spinach, or Kale. If you ever move onto completing the full Daniels, or eating raw this will be your source of protein. 

Here's a sample weekly menu that I use, I'm a leftover fanatic so my dinners often double as lunch the next day. I don't measure when making my meals, and often google the recipes. If any dish piques your interest, I can provide my recipe.

Happy fasting, happy eating, happy living.

Washday Blues + Techniques ALL napturals should master

I live in our nations capital, where despite the abundance of Nubian napturals in the Mecca, the salon selection isn't as diverse (on the pockets) as one would think. I make an effort to have a stylist for every coif. I have a braider, a presser, a twister, an up-doer and a timmer on deck.

This search has taken four years, and if one were to move, my life would temporarily be in shambles.

Many natural stylists in this area charge by the hour, and the longer your hair, the heftier the charge, and that's fine, but what you WON'T do is complain about the length of my hair and proceed to take your time coifing it. So for the past two years, I would only visit a stylists chair if I have an event to attend and need something speedy, if I had just taken down braids, or weave and wanted someone else to fight with my hair, or if I needed a trim.

One thing that I have noticed as of late, is that the longer my hair grows, the more reticent my stylists are to do it. If I walk into a salon for the first time I promise the stylists all head to the back to draw straws, where the loser has to suffer through my hair. Dominican salons are notorious for telling me ' mami, you'r hair is too long,' as if that would cause me to walk out. My (former) braider once told me that Sheeba was 'too long for Senegalese twists' and that she was going to have to 'charge [me] extra for the style.'

So I told her to charge me whatever she needed to complete my style and never used her services again.

I have long hair, and your job is to style it... questions, comments, and concerns about anything other than the health of my hair can be kept to yourself. Have any of you experienced the same reaction?

Because of this treatment, I often take it upon myself to wash and style my own hair and experience for myself the washday blues. This past Sunday was washday, and I did the unthinkable by forgoing hopping into the shower and washing my hair in the sink instead. 


Judge away....

But I cut my wash time drastically. I normally am in the shower for 2 hours sectioning, 'shampooing', conditioning, detangling, (and deep conditioning if need be). But on Sunday I completed all of the above INCLUDING sitting under my Beheutiful steamer in 45 minutes.

Praise to the Most High for shampoo hoses like this one: 

I have my life back.

With my shampoo hose, Jilbere comb, and Clorox wipes to clean around the sink afterwards, my washday blues are now a distant memory.

I am actually excited to wash my hair now that it's no longer such a labor intensive chore.

On another note, I was talking (coaching) a friend the other day on how to coif her hair other than her usual puff, and it dawned on me that there are 3 techniques that I think all naturals should master as their hair grows in preparation for maintaining it.

1. Moisturizing - your growth goal will miserably fail if you do not properly moisturize your ends. They are the oldest part of your hair, take care and cherish them. Click here for a primer on my L-O-C method.

2. Two-Strand Twists - are to naturals as rice is to the Caribbean diet. It.is.ESSENTIAL to surviving. Many of your hair styles revolve around this basic technique. YouTube has a plethora of videos that can show you how to properly twist to achieve your dream twist-out, up-do, bun, etc. This is my go-to style. I can get a three-week break out of a twisted style:
Week 1: twists set on perm rods for a curly do
Week 2: curls have dropped so I can either pin them into an up-do, bun, or half up/half-down
Week 3: twist out, preserved by pineappling at night.

3. Flat twists - are another great way to achieve a twist out. I also create Goddess-twists with three flat twists gathered into a bun, or for an up-do. Again...let YouTube be your guide and spend a few minutes practicing.

Here's a mash-up of many of my go-to styles many of these are styles I have worn and styles I have created for others:

If you take the time to learn these techniques now, you'll be glad in the future when you're searching for an easy low manipulation style to rock for the week.

Happy learning my loves.

Kinky Curly Chicken & Beer

By now you all know that I don't put anything in my hair that I can not eat. But there comes a point in time where one must draw the line, and for me that line was drawn when a friend asked if I put Crisco in my hair.

My grandma's shortening?? No thank you.

I have spent months lurking in forums and reading up on using Crisco as a moisturizer, shampoo, deep conditioner, and etc. but I can not and will not bring myself to slather the white artery clogger on Sheeba. 

I don't want to smell like chicken (I'm being crass. I know the only way I would smell like a 2 piece and a biscuit is if I put used Crisco in my hair) and more importantly, I fear the havoc that would ensue on my skin. I would look like a pubescent 14 year old. Thinking of using the product might even cause a pimple.

No ma'am. No ham. No turkey. 

Now one secret weapon in my arsenal of 'natural' hair products is beer. Yes, you read that correctly. I rinse my hair with beer from time to time. 

This all began years ago after a house party. I throw large game nights in the summer and often have guests bring adult beverages. There's always tons of bottles left over, and being a wine/ brown liquor aficionado, I needed to find something to do with the cases of beer left under my dining room table. 

A few hours of research later, I was standing in the shower giving Sheeba a beer bath. She loves it and may be an alchy. My hair has become super soft as a result of beer rinses.

Beer is made from fermented hops and yeast. Which creates a host of benefits for dry hair. Beer has B vitamins like biotin that promote growth, protein, sugars to strengthen and boost shine, and if wheat based, volumizing properties. The list was enough to make me pop open a bottle and pour away. 

You're probably giving me the grandma side eye and wondering why I'd pour beer in my hair over Crisco. The same reason you use Miss Jessie's versus Carols Daughter... I prefer to. 

I have also read articles speaking to the benefits of beer on your skin. So next time you happen to have a few brews left around the house, or discover an old case in the back of your outside fridge, take a sip and give your hair a beer bath. 

A Natural Misunderstanding

Recently, I discovered Jelly Belly 'Bean Boozled' candies. The premise is that the box has jelly beans in various sweet and (un)savory flavors, but similar colors. So a black jelly bean may be licorice OR skunk spray. The only way to find out is to take a bite....I wasn't too lucky and ate the skunk spray bean instead of the licorice. Not even brushing my teeth helped remove the taste.

In some ways, maneuvering from relaxed to natural can be the same way. You know what jelly bean you want (natural), but from the outside looking in, things are not always as they appear. I remember wanting to go natural because it would mean healthier tresses (semi-lie), be less time consuming (even bigger lie), and cheaper (Get thee behind me, Satan).

For one, natural hair does not equate healthier hair. I know plenty of naturals suffering from heat damage (been there), dandruff (done that), and split ends (got the T-Shirt), all ailments that have plagued Sheeba prior to me switching my hair regimen. Healthy natural hair takes time and care. The same can be said for relaxed hair. The longer my hair grows, the more I try to maintain healthy ends, moisturize my scalp, and limit the amount of heat applied to it. Sorry to break it to you, but natural healthy hair does not come naturally (pun intended).

Another misnomer is that natural hair is less time consuming. If I ever find the person who began this myth, I have a few 'choice' words to share with them because I  never spent this much time doing my hair when I had a relaxer. My mother took me to the salon for my 1st relaxer when I was 6, and I recall spending every other Saturday morning in the salon with my sister getting our manes coiffed. I didn't mind the four hour process and was even elated when I was finally able to sit under the dryer without the stack of phonebooks to prop me up.

Nowadays, I dread going to salons and (sometimes) even doing my own hair. From wash to style, it can take me up to 6 hours to tame Sheeba....and that's on a weekly basis. If I am applying henna, taking down braids, or twists, it can be a two day -over the weekend- process to wash, condition, and detangle my hair, all that work to have my arms give out and end up in a pineapple on top of my head. Natural hair -mine at least- is not less time consuming. Yes, I am no longer bound to my hairdressers schedule, but I treat my hair delicately and therefore must spend more time ensuring that every knot is untangled, and every section is combed through.

Now the biggest lie I've heard regarding being natural is that it is cheaper that being relaxed.

I'm here to douse some Holy Water on that myth.

If you get your hair washed every week and relaxed every 4 weeks, then yes, being relaxed may be more costly than being natural. But if not, you relaxed sisters may be coming out on top. I was a product junkie, like many nubian naturals, so I would spend anywhere from $50-$100 a year on products, just to determine if my hair liked said product. Here's a summary of what a year of maintaining Sheeba looks like:

Service	Cost	Frequency	Total
Products	$50-$100		$50-$100
Trim/ Deep Condition	$45	4x	$180
Senegalese Twists	$200	1x	$200
Length-Check Press	$60	1x	$60
Random 2-strand Updo	$100-$120	3x	$300-$360
Protective Sew-In	$200 (hair) + $150 (install)	2x	$350 (1st install) + $150 (2nd install) = $500
Total			$1,290 - $1,400

Now lets compare being natural to my relaxed Miami & Dominican blow-out life:

Service	Cost	Frequency	Total
Products	$20-$50		$20-$50
Wash and Blow-out	$30	26x	$780
Relaxer	$45	6x	$270
Total			$1,070 - $1,100

I'm spending between $220 - $300 more on my hair now than when I was relaxed.

Now after shedding some (personal) light onto the natural misunderstanding, you may be wondering whether or not it's worth it to go and/or stay natural. And without any hesitation, I would say a thousand times yes.

Yes, I miss salon chatter and yes, it may be more work, more time, and more costly, but being able to have the flexibility of wearing my hair fro'd out, kinky, curly, loc'd, or bone straight is something that I would never give up. Not now. Not ever.

Like the famous work of natural hair art says: My only regret in being natural, is that I didn't do it sooner...